Hand Me Off (song I've written.)

Black and white
Have never felt so right.
So many shades of gray
The color’s washed away
Beetles and bug-eyed
We’ll turn to the right side
And left it too loosely
Tied with the accusing

Well go, hand me off now
Into the crowd, who’re screaming out loud.
Bend me until I break
This was no mistake
I’ll eat my own cake and I’ll make it, too.

Old and stumbling along
Just hummin’ a song
Free their poor arms
All tangled and harmed
I’ll be where you are.

Well go, hand me off now
Into the crowd, who’re screaming out loud.
Bend me until I break
This was no mistake
I’ll eat my own cake and I’ll make it, too.
And make it too.
We hold the truth.
To tie up this youth, in denial
Told you so it’s alone.
Left here on your own
But roll your own stone
So it goes again.
And it goes again.

So misunderstood
They tell you it’s too good
To be close to the truth
You know “we don’t know you”
So wrap up again
It is time to pretend
When the wreckage distends
Then I’ll shout it out loud.

Well go, hand me off now
Into the crowd, who’re screaming out loud.
Bend me until I break
This was no mistake
I’ll eat my own cake and I’ll make it, too.
Making it, but you’re breaking it (until it bends again)
Until we send again.
Go, barefoot in the snow
You’ve now stubbed your toe
And yet nobody, nobody knows you!
Well go, hand me off now (hand me off now)
Into the crowd, who’re screaming out loud. (screaming out loud)
Bend me until I break (until I break)
This was no mistake (was no mistake)
I’ll eat my own cake and I’ll make it, too…

Thoughts Like Ticking Time Bombs.

I am reminded every day, every good mood of some sort of depression. Like you, who meant so much to me and decided to exit my life stage right. Is it so hard to deal with me? If so, why can I not see how? What do I do to deserve this painful departure.

And so, I hold my head tight and let my thoughts disappear again. Nothing is worth willing unhappiness. I am strong enough to deal with this, and so are you. So is everyone, all the broken hearts and lonely minds. I know you can hold this world on your back, were you to try. Maybe this is bigger than the world, though. I couldn't fathom a problem you couldn't fix. I love you too much to let you hurt.

Sitting in a waiting room full of average people. It's so odd, to see these men and women and children just sitting and willing time to move faster. In a psychiatrist's office, you'd imagine crazy people. But no, I try to see past the exterior and imagine what mental restrictions they could possibly have inside. Imagination, I like that word. It's bigger than anything, and limitless.

And back to base one. I will not allow myself the release of unhappiness right now. I will not be weak, and because it is obvious to myself that I can deal with much more, I will smile. This is nothing compared to what hand I've been dealt before. I am superman. I can live. I can climb this mountain. This is my mantra, now and forever.